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i want you because i shouldn't want you at alli want you like i want succulent strawberries dripping over a white lacy dress,
i want you like i want complete silence on a sweltering august night,
i want you like it's dead rats melting over hot gutters and then it's your hot guts on my body.
i want you and your collarbones tied to my strings of saliva,
i want you smelling like you're some wild wolverine with incisors as sharp as rose petals,
i want you broken and bleeding just so i can nourish your wounds.
i want you dangerously close and always so,
i want you angry as you are passionate,
i want you in ways i don't even understand.
And I will Always be the MoonWe have gotten so attached to these days and these months,
but a deer doesn't know a Tuesday from a Thursday
and a caribou can't comprehend that it was born on a September afternoon,
but they can understand this instant, this moment, this breath,
only now, no longer the past, and only the future when they get there,
there's a healthy lack of awareness in that,
escaping the fear of death but thriving off the instinct to live,
everything so primal and based off gut reactions,
I guess you could say ignorance is bliss,
but ignorance only actually applies when it comes to humanity,
oh I would like a life like that,
one that is organic, tangible, and ripe with bloody berries,
one where carnal creatures run rampant,
one where we rise from the dirt with muddy thighs
because we were bred into these earthly bodies
to hold seconds in our palms like newborn children,
and to throw our heads back and howl against the awareness that we are dying,
for oh this skin is only our host,
The CatalystI have thoughts
but I never think.
Underestimation of your affection,
of your jealousy,
I, a breaching whale who breathed too deep.
Like bubble wrap
the air pockets in my lungs are pop, pop, popping;
I am nothing if not lonely air.
My thoughtless mind
so driven by my gullible heart,
too quick to believe you could ever love me
at least the way I love you,
But is this love if I am bleeding?
Your carnivore's touch,
your narcotic smile;
catalysts in my river of veins.
What Turns Me Oni. bright cotton candy colors,
so lush and vivid,
I want those pastel pigments
dissolving my taste buds and
brushing over my tongue
like they were made of velvet.
ii. reptilian skin,
those scales so rough
and those alligator teeth
I want those teeth
to take me by the neck,
leaving me with scaling wounds.
iii. blood draws,
being drained of liquid emotion
to come out feeling light headed,
then fucking euphoric
like you're made of stained glass
and the sun is lighting you up
phantom breath igniting your spine,
being cradled in the arms of a shadow,
being grasped by the hands of the wind.
the clavicle indentations
that make me want to scream
because they are so lovely,
unfolding themselves like paper cranes,
angular yet angelic.
vi. a button up shirt being unbuttoned,
the thought of you sliding it off my shoulders
as though it were made up of sins.
ripe for the plucking red,
no artificial sweeteners,
only the blood of an organic berr
I Dream of WolverinesAn alabaster calla lily blooms out of my belly button,
I pull on its vines to remove its roots,
but I only end up more tightly wound
in ribbons of green and of sorrow,
and now I'm sleeping more than I wake,
because I dream of wolverines, long dresses,
and old buildings collapsing like old people,
I can't look away nor can I open my nighttime eyes,
I live in a world of hedonistic passion,
one where we consume salamander hearts
just as much as we consume each other.
as we become ghostsThe air is smooth and thin,
running over my shoulders like buttermilk,
curling wax fingers
and smoke escaping my oak tree bones,
I don't know where I'll end up yet but
I know I'm close,
and I know I'm close because I'm still breathing,
inhaling that charred floral scent
where dahlias are breeding in the curves of my collarbone
and lilacs are blooming between each vertebrae,
intertwining with every rib, climbing them like strands of DNA,
oh you know I wouldn't mind if you used my ribs for a ladder,
go ahead and use me up like some sort of construction worker,
for my body is yours to take, my heart to break,
but I should let you know now that this love is a disease,
it will leave you in ruins with teeth like Aztec tombs rotting inside your mouth,
and it will leave your hands forming empty circles in the sky where the stars should be,
but all of this is okay because when we're together I can see the moon in your eyes
and the sun in your lips,
when they dare form a smile, your kiss
I've got the skin of snakesI am nature's baby
with human hands,
I breathe in with the trees,
to breathe out rings of smoke,
I am floral, I am a cumulus cloud,
I am a solid gold tombstone,
engraved with animal bone.
can't breathe, at least not steadily,
paint me turquoise
or be the forest to my fire,
actually I'd rather you were nothing, at least nothing to me,
now I can feel nightfall coming upon the manifestation of a July moon,
so let's let those clouds burst and rip wide open
just as though the clouds were my organs and
the rain were my blood.
The Art of ForestryIf it were only appropriate to speak
of a single touch, of what it means,
of what it feels.
Our forearms graze and so I hold very still,
I never want to lose a second of
you against me.
My entire being shivers along the
shores of your skin
and all of my nerve endings are electrified
when I imagine our relationship evolving into
lilac limbs, freshly kissed lips, and
lieing next to you on rainforest floors.
We create a completely nuclear reaction,
a mixture of fusion, friction, and fascination.
So believe me when I say, oh boy I love you,
I really do,
yes, I want you so,
closer than tires upon pavement,
and like a car you turn into me,
and like a car you take me places,
you even take my daydreams to extraordinary realms
where I wake in the midst of the woods,
the air is slick and crisp
and I can feel your muddy, autumn hands
dancing along my flaking, fir tree flesh,
the dirt runs damp between our toes
and we become nothing but creatures of the forest;
living off each other's lo
Smell it upon thy nose
As lungs of graphite
Breathe in the body
Shapely and refined
Crisp and sharp
Verily it is so
Perchance we will meet
Our souls are black
Rotten to the core
Of our third eye
Dost thou see it!
The bright shining light that calls to us
Flow like water
What music doth flow
Muffled and silenced
By its cage of wood
We shall never break free
Smell our stench of determination
Hear our mutter ramblings
Taste our words as we force them into your mouths
Watch as we carve our creations
Chisel and hammer
Dance little puppet!
Dance for us!
Do our bidding
We are your Masters
We shall last forever.
We are the Writers.
Love From AfarWhenever you're here I feel so alive,
Like nothing in this world can bring me down.
But whenever you're gone I feel dead inside,
Like I'm trapped in a river, destined to drown.
One moment you're here, the very next, you're gone.
I wish you could stay by my side where you belong.
Our time together is always so short, it just never lasts;
Yet our time apart stretches until it's far too long.
Without you around to keep my heart warm,
The most trivial things can ruin my day.
And there's no relief when it's all said and done,
Because you're not here to take the pain away.
I see the end of the tunnel, but the light is too far off.
My days feel empty and my motivation is lacking.
And even though I know it'll be worth it in time,
The days drag on as if intentionally slacking.
I push forward with the promise of seeing you again,
You keep me going even though I wish to give in.
I know that we'll be together in the end,
But this feels like a game that I just can't win.
I'll keep going no matter w
morning.my coffee is cold
and so is the body.
in the residue
like the first-fallen
like the foggy monday
that refuses to know
until it's time
SobrietyIf I told you not to touch me,
would you know to stay away?
Would you smoke yourself to death,
while I sit in Church and pray?
It's been sixty four days of counting Sheep
and hoping there's a God.
I've been keeping time in seconds,
breaking bottles with my thoughts.
It's hard to be a Patron Saint
when my temptation runs this strong.
I can't keep from liquid fame,
without faith in something for this long.
I know cigarettes won't keep
the satisfaction I crave at bay.
If I told you that I needed you
would you leave me in dismay?
Strength is more than minutes,
more than hours, more than time.
The Sermon's escalating quickly
the Organ's playing, hymns in rhyme.
I feel my days are numbered,
and my candle's burning out.
I can't see the Pealy Gates they speak of
St. Peter refuses me the route.
love song.we are the vulnerable 3am,
locking ourselves safely away
in each other's arms
and whispering our secrets,
our fears and our dreams,
gently passing the words
from my lips to yours
and back again
with each cautious kiss.
we are the breaking sunrise,
the early morning lovers
of light and darkness
as they embrace on the horizon
and set apart their separate ways.
we are the daybreak,
the lightning strike and
the thunder scream,
the moonlight and
the night sky,
colliding oceans and
that paints this
ghost of a town
with sapphire and sulfur,
wonder and wasteland,
we are the morning
and the midnight,
and we are born again.
Your dreamsLet your dreams
Give you wings
And all the things
That you've ever hoped for
But reality never could give you.
Till death do us apartclose your eyes, hold on
let go of the people
who drag you further down.
look at the ones you love
and never forger the ones
you lost along the way.
you have to carry on
time will push you further
don't waste any of it
I will take your hand
and together we will go
through the darkness
of this short life
till death do us apart
Why Do You Love Me?I've never been an object of desire,
That is until the day I met you.
You ignited my soul and set me on fire,
Then you danced in the flames, not minding the burn.
You embrace all of my quirks without a hint of disapproval,
What's even more amazing is that you seem to adore them.
You encourage my awkward and unusual antics,
Which are characteristics which most others would condemn.
You took me to a place I've never been before,
To a sanctuary of comfort, security and compassion.
When there was nowhere left to turn, you opened up the door,
So readily welcoming me into your heart and your arms.
Your love is something that I can't comprehend,
That you could want someone like me is something surreal.
I keep thinking that it's all just a game of pretend,
Like a dream from which I'll wake into a bitter reality.
You tell me that you'll be here until I make you leave,
As if that's something I'd ever really do.
You say that I'm your world and it's so hard to believe,
As insignificant as I am, th
False laborI cannot remember the beginning of the labor and I find it hard to believe that I will ever see the end. The contractions are ruthless and turn me inside out against my will. My plea for an epidural goes unanswered, and after a few hours, I'm so exhausted that I find it hard to care anymore.
I have never known this kind of pain before, this agony deep inside of me, tearing at my belly, sinking its claws into my spine. It tries to crawl up my throat, but I choke back the scream.
Nine months of waiting, nine months of anxiety, culminating in a few hours of sheer terror. I am clenching someone's hand tightly, too tightly, but this transference of pain does nothing to lessen my own.
I do not cry until they lay her on my chest. Looking at her, I forget to breathe. Destructive as I am, it seems highly implausible that I made this mewling scrap of life. I can't believe she's here.
And then, just when I reach for her, my baby dissolves like smoke on the wind, and I am left with empty hands and
the sugar in your smile, the glucose in your bloodIt's searching fingertips,
gingerly placed empty spaces,
and wrong timing,
but now it's I love you, oh wait I really do,
please don't leave me under these carnival lights alone
because I can't bare another day without your syrup sweet blood,
you are the sugar in my coffee
and the honey on my toast,
the candy rotting my teeth,
and the molasses thick air I inhale on summer nights.
Crown of ThornsShe wakes up with red staining her pillow
and the taste of blood like iron in her mouth
It stains her teeth and leaks from her lips, and as she
rinses her mouth out, she can’t help thinking that
it’s better than dirt and ashes
it feels like she’s wearing a noose
of broken promises and shattered glass
that tightens around her throat with every day that passes
She nails a smile to her face
and doesn't let herself think the word dying
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^Nyx-Valentine arrived in our community and started whipping everyone into a frenzy with her relentless desire to bring the Artistic Nude and Fetish galleries to the fore. 9 years later, and it's safe to say that Nyx is not only a leader as a photographer in these galleries, but she has also established herself as a much saught after model. ^... Read More